Tag Archives: Rhetoric

Go fuck yourself I say to the cold weather

rough-seas-1885

Go fuck yourself I say to the cold weather.
Go fuck yourself I say to the stubborn river.
Go fuck yourself I say to the erupting volcano.
Go fuck yourself I say to the rain and thunder.
Go fuck yourself I say to the raging fire.
Go fuck yourself I say to the standing tree and sleeping flower.
Go fuck yourself I say to the forest and nature.
Go fuck yourself I say to the park and the jungle.
Go fuck yourself I say to the village and the city.
Go fuck yourself I say to the cloud and current.
Go fuck yourself I say to the storm and torrent.
Go fuck yourself I say to the desert and winter.
Go fuck yourself I say to the wind and shadow.
Go fuck yourself I say to the sun and the moon.
Go fuck yourself I say to the cave and valley.
Go fuck yourself I say to the street and alley.
Go fuck yourself I say to the mountain and the flood.
Go fuck yourself I say to the pyramid and tower.
Go fuck yourself I say to the bridge and tunnel.
Go fuck yourself I say to the wave and stone.
Go fuck yourself I say to the seed and grain.
Go fuck yourself I say to the sand and fog.
Go fuck yourself I say to the tomb and monument.
Go fuck yourself I say to the coal and ashes.
And to those not mentioned, I say:
Get out and hang yourself.

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What is life, anyway?*

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What is life, anyway? For that is a practical question. What is it that we should prize it so highly? Do any of you dare tell the truth to yourselves? There is not a person in this audience that dares tell himself the truth about life. Do you remember the story- I believe it came from Homer- about some shipwrecked mariners who were cast upon an island. And, in that island was a great giant with one eye, and that eye had been put out. But, somehow or other, he managed to get all these people into an iron cage, and; every morning he would come out for breakfast, run his arms into the iron cage and feel this one and that one to see which was the fattest, take him off and cook him for breakfast. No one knew whose turn would come next. Each one knew that his time was near, that he might be next. That is life, isn’t it? A great insane, purposeless, uncontrolled, uncontrollable, hand, reaching down, without though or design or pity, taking this and that, as the case may be, inevitable, unfailingly, and yet we are optimists! Do you want to live your lives over, any of you! Would I want to? Would anybody want to? There might be vagrant parts of my life, strong sensations, pleasant memories. But barring those, the time I would want to live over, would be the time I was asleep- that is the time I was dead- that is all. And every weary person comes home at night happy in the thought that he can sleep. And if he cannot sleep without it, he takes dope to make him sleep, because forgetfulness is the best of all. Continue reading

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The Yekaterinburg lecture: Sasha Grey on popular culture

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On her journey of becoming a global icon of our time, the multi-talented artist Sasha Grey recently stopped by in Yekaterinburg, Russia to give a public lecture. Yes, you read it right and your eyes are not deceiving you. The former megastar of porn, the wonderful Sasha Grey was not giving a blowie – as one might have thought or expected – she was, rather, sincerely presenting her views and diligently enlightening the masses on the current state of our culture. This is not the beginning of some sick and twisted joke. Far from it. These are dead cold facts. And I have evidence to prove it.

According to the local reports (see – <a http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QfBx3gdiNQ</a&gt; ), the building – in which our heroine appeared –  was packed with listeners, journalists and other media representatives. Not everyone got in to see the history unfolding right in front of their eyes. The less fortunate had to wait outside for their chance to receive an expert advice on proper being and authentic living.

What follows next should be viewed in the tradition of Demosthenes’ Philippics and Cicero’s letters, Lincoln’s Gettysburg address and Martin Luther King Jr‘s speech “I have a dream”. The Yekaterinburg lecture of Sasha Grey is nothing short of brilliance. Before all is said and done, it will go down in history as one of the greatest orations of modern times. Obama’s ghostwriter should really take notes on how to generate a devoted following and an electrifying magnetism beyond the borders of Washington.
But before I present to you the partial transcript of Miss Grey’s lecture, remember that you read it first here. So, when one fine day my words come true and I acquire a halo of a prophet, you are fully entitled to confess: “Magnus was my master.” Continue reading

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